About two decades ago, BDSM was seen as something obscure and enigmatic, hidden and imperceptible. Sharing our intimate sexual fantasies and fetishes, particularly those seen as unconventional, was not commonly...
About two decades ago, BDSM was seen as something obscure and enigmatic, hidden and imperceptible. Sharing our intimate sexual fantasies and fetishes, particularly those seen as unconventional, was not commonly practiced. However, all that has now changed.
Today, BDSM representations can be found everywhere. Since the past few years, kinky sexual practices and depictions have become increasingly prevalent in mainstream culture, permeating various aspects of pop culture. Songs, movies, books, and even morning talk shows openly address various aspects of bondage.
Even though Rihanna's popular song ‘S&M’ and E.L. James's Fifty Shades of Grey are often credited with boosting the popularity of BDSM, the reality is that BDSM, just like other sexual preferences, has existed for as long as man has desired sex. Today we’ll be discussing the evolution of BDSM in popular culture and how kink and bondage are depicted and perceived today.
In the 1990s, Madonna achieved the status of being a top-selling author on the New York Times bestseller list. Many expressed surprise that the former Material Girl, who was at the peak of her musical career at the time, could so easily sell numerous copies of a book. The twist, however, was the content of the book: an unconventional, BDSM-inspired volume boldly named Sex.
Now, this wasn’t the first time Madonna had dabbled with the idea of intense and aggressive romance and kink. Her 1990s Blond Ambition World Tour showcased various bondage-inspired outfits, including the iconic ‘cone bra’. However, it was the singer’s Sex project that truly excited and allured the public to Madonna's fantasy life related to sexuality. Images in the book showed the singer and her close group in arousing levels of nakedness and closeness. Moreover, the book itself appeared to be designed specifically for a sex/kink dungeon, featuring elements such as leather, chains, bondage, and nudity.
This is just one of many examples that shows how kink and BDSM have been a part of the entertainment industry for many years. Nevertheless, it failed to become the heart of mainstream popular culture due to the use of vague, indirect, or possibly unrelatable references.
Ah, the Fifty Shades of Grey series. It's impossible to deny the impact the Fifty Shades trilogy has had based on the ideology and acceptance of BDSM – its sales figures speak for themselves! The trifecta has sold over 100 million copies globally across 52 languages. Furthermore, the initial official trailer for the movie version of Fifty Shades was the most popular trailer of 2014, accumulating over 100 million views. And guess where the provocative trailer involving bondage and hardcore sex first debuted? No, it wasn’t late-night cable or adult websites, but on the morning-time show Today!
But let’s cut to the chase – why is any mention of BDSM incomplete without crediting Fifty Shades? Here’s your answer: in entertainment and the media, BDSM is often shown not only as a forbidden sexual preference but also as dysfunctional and harmful. Fifty Shades has challenged those ideas by shedding a more favorable, even romantic, perspective on the more unconventional aspects of sexuality and has helped people embrace their inner kink and quirkiness when it comes to playful intercourse.
Based on a survey, 68 percent of participants believed that Fifty Shades of Grey has helped normalize or popularize BDSM. Spanking and handcuffs once considered uncommon in most bedrooms, have been embraced by individuals in healthy relationships and are now considered normal elements in casual sexual experiences. Moreover, recreating favorite scenes from the movie series is an activity that a growing number of couples are showing more and more interest in. And if you didn’t know, there are also a variety of Fifty Shades-inspired sex toys and tools specifically designed for satisfying BDSM desires!
Nevertheless, some practitioners claim Fifty Shades isn’t an accurate portrayal of what BDSM is about. But there is no denying that it has given a great number of people the much-needed freedom to explore their kinkier side without fear of judgment or rejection.
Engaging in BDSM activities is often seen as taboo, especially when people of color are involved with white participants. Depictions of minority groups in movies can influence the perception of these groups by the public, highlighting the importance of the quality of such portrayals.
In a research project at the University of Lynchburg in 2022, a student analyzed popular movies and TV shows from the past 30 years showing BDSM acts by both white and non-white individuals, to investigate if the portrayal is inherently favorable or unfavorable.
The study revealed that the general depiction of BDSM leaned towards negativity and individuals of color engaging in BDSM were frequently depicted as 'exotic' or vulnerable compared to white individuals. This highlights a lack of inclusion and acceptability in the media, and a need to understand that BDSM isn’t related to color or gender, rather it is a mindset and an inner desire to be sexually pleasured in uncommon ways.
Fast forward to 2024, and things are very different. Portrayals of BDSM are no longer limited to sensational, unconventional, and thrilling foreplays and passionate love-making. BDSM is now shown in media such as TV, movies, and music as something common, ordinary, and typical that happens in the bedroom. Viewers can find both provocative portrayals on late-night cable shows, docudramas, and crime dramas, as well as wholesome portrayals on primetime sitcoms and soap operas.
BDSM is no longer viewed as something frightening, risky, and thrilling. It is also amusing, affectionate, and safe. Many well-known songs feature and honor BDSM dynamics in their lyrics, including Control (Puddle of Mudd, 2001), For Your Entertainment (Adam Lambert, 2009), and Call Me by Your Name (Lil Nas X, 2021), as they did in Janet Jackson's works like Rope Burn (1997) almost twenty years ago!
Besides movies and music, the integration of BDSM into mainstream culture has resulted in its presence in popular media channels like primetime TV and advertisements, as well as a change in perception from being exotic to being both normal and common. The way BDSM is reported in the news has also changed; major newspapers and magazines no longer only cover sensational and scandalous crime stories related to BDSM but also include balanced discussions about the consensual adult BDSM community.
Our experimentation with unconventional sexuality is not a recent thing. In fact, the majority of us will continue to be fascinated by concepts that defy boundaries and dare to venture into the unknown. As with BDSM, well, it’s pretty obvious that it’s very tactfully made its way into our bedrooms via sometimes subtle and sometimes blatant nudges from the media.
Instead of shying away from it, more and more people are embracing BDSM practices and evolving their sexual lives both physically and emotionally. So, the next time you plan a night of sexual wonders with your partner, put on a kinky song, watch a kinky movie, and blow each other’s brains out!
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